Hurm.  I haven't purged in the last two days; it's kind of a relief.  My appetite was completely out of whack all last week, which meant I ate basically nothing the entire day and then, when I ate at night, purged because the bulk of the food felt so uncomfortable after being empty all day.  But now I'm trying harder to stick to my meal plan - I  ( Read more... )

You know how some eating disordered people, when they see other people eating, feel superior because they're resisting?  Lately I've been really paranoid that it's happening to me - like, I'll be in public eating lunch, and suddenly I'll wonder if someone with an ED is looking at me and thinking about how weak I am for giving in to my hunger and ( Read more... )

No therapy appointment for me today - she had an emergency, so she's not going to be in the office.  That's okay - I didn't really have anything to talk about.  We rescheduled for Monday at 1 instead.  And I'm meeting with my dietician at 10:30 on Thursday, so I don't get to sleep in the day after finals.  (Not that I care, since I've been sleeping ( Read more... )

My day was going fine, if unproductively so.  Prior to my previous entry, I had woken up early, eaten a healthy breakfast, worked out, and chatted with my mom.  Once I got home from the ultimately useless paper-writing excursion, I went out on our deck with City of Bones to relax and get some sun.  I'm a little sunburned, but that's good: I always ( Read more... )

I've listened to this song way too many times today.  Anyway.

Just finished my Social Psych test, and I'm pleased to report that I did really well - I still have a chance of getting an A- in the class provided I make the final my bitch.  That would be nice, since an A- counts for 3.7 while a B+ is only a 3.0.  Speaking of which, I think it's really ( Read more... )

I feel like a complete failure for eating, because last night I kept myself from purging a bunch of Easter candy by deciding not to have anything but coffee today.  But then I talked myself into eating, so now it's 2 pm and I've already had 860 calories, give or take.  The healthy part of me knows that's fine, and is glad I took in some actual ( Read more... )

I have a car!  I've named her Sylvia (as in, "Who is Sylvia?  What is she / that all our swains commend her?"  Apparently she's a dark blue Honda Civic.)  (And yes, I realize that I need to stop using Shakespeare like this, since it just makes me look pretentious.)  Best Easter present ever, y/y?

I dragged my brother all the way to Wash U so I could ( Read more... )

My multivitamin has been making me so nauseous lately.  I've spent the last half-hour curled in a ball, afraid to move.

I think seeing a dietician on Friday freaked me out a bit - I'm really nervous about having to give up some control and follow someone else's advice.  She doesn't want me weighing myself more than once a week, and I'm supposed to ( Read more... )